Ukrainian domestic abuse survivor finds help to divorce: Yulia’s story

Yulia and her husband married in Ukraine in 2017. When the war broke out, they escaped to the UK and settled here with their young child.

The dynamics in their relationship soon started to change, with Yulia’s husband becoming emotionally, psychologically and sexually abusive towards her. Back in Ukraine, Yulia had been a teacher, but in the UK she only worked part-time on a zero hours contract.

Desperately wanting to divorce her husband, Yulia realised that she would struggle to afford to live on her own and stay in the area she wanted her son to go to school in.

“I feel I cannot stay in this relationship anymore. It’s like I am physically alive, but dying on the inside,” she said. “I’m trying to plan the divorce the best way I can, so I can make it less traumatising for my son. I feel anxious because I am not home, and don’t have my support system here.”

Yulia had questions about how she could obtain a divorce in the most cost-effective way, how she could afford housing as a single parent and whether she would have a claim to any joint assets.

Finding legal help

After first receiving assistance from Women’s Aid, they recommended she seek legal advice from FLAG DV.

Through FLAG DV, Yulia made a 30-minute appointment with volunteer family specialist solicitor Paola Cuffolo from Horsey Lightly Solicitors, who addressed the issues she was most concerned about. She told Yulia:

• There were viable options to apply for a divorce in both the UK and Ukraine, explaining the processes of how to do both and advising on which one may be simpler and more cost-effective.
• About her legal options for separating assets via the family court in the UK or Ukraine. This advice included the possible personal costs associated with pursuing claims for these assets, meaning Yulia could make an informed decision about whether it was financially viable to do so as their shared assets were minimal.
• As she and her husband didn’t own a property, she would be able to access specialist housing advice from Citizens Advice and they would be able to help her figure out whether she could get support to stay in her local area.

Looking forward

After her appointment, Yulia said: “The lawyer was lovely and I am grateful for having the access to this service. Because when you’re a guest in this country, you don’t know what you’re entitled to and you don’t know what’s right and what’s wrong. So I’m thankful that she saw me as a human being and tried to help me.”

Volunteer solicitor Paola said: “Supporting both women and men through the FLAG DV service is challenging but so rewarding. You never quite know what their circumstances might be, and often they are not aware of the help that is out there, leading to tremendous fear and anxiety that they may be trapped in their situation.

Helping them to see that there is light at the end of the tunnel is really rewarding for me, and, I hope, valuable to them.”

In the following months, Yulia filed for divorce in Ukraine and moved out of the marital home. She went through mediation to agree contact arrangements with her ex-husband and now lives peacefully with her son.

*name changed to protect anonymity